what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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