I want to make a zoo with you.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
the day after is always just damage control
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
