doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
