k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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