JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Your penis caused this!
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
