their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
