Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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