The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
You're a waste of cheezeits
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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