The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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