critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
