but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
