We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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