For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
