Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
He uses pillows to masturbate.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
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