she was so not down for the gang bang
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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