We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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