you're like a bully in the Christmas story
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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