remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Someone signed my nipple.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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