he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Randomize