Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
The power of my boobs compel you
Randomize
