im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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