i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
