dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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