btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
