What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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