I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize