sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
