i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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