I love black thongs
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
