he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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