I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
