I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
