i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Just pee around me
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Randomize
