HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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