It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
