i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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