butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
