I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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