office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
