It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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