5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
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