he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
