is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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