I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
