I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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