Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
