I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Randomize
