Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
