You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
