I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
