Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
